I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history
We made it out alive and that's a victory
Black eyes, minor injuries
We lost a fight together that's a win for meI don't drink cuz when I'm drunk I'm retarded
Ask around, I'm alive all the morning
Hold my beer, cuz I'm only getting started
Guess 'bout tomorrow I'm the miseryI'm a mess, and I know you don't deserve it
You're the best, and I'm a pretty stupid person
Nonetheless, you're tryna help me cuz I'm hurtin'
I confess, sometimes I feel like I'm not worth itI don't drink, cuz when I'm drunk I'm a problem
I don't care, who I hurt, I feel awesome
Holy crap, it's either jail or a coffin
Soon enough, I'ma be at rock bottom
Please help, tell me how I end up here
Last night, I had one too many beers
Flashbacks, but I can remember clear
Why I texted all my ex-es and we haven't
Spoke in yearsEvery time that I'm hung over
Last night doesn't feel so funny
I threw up all my frontstep
And I wasted all my money
I got naked in a nightclub
Right in front of all my buddies
Then I went home with some girl
I thought was hot, but she is uglyI'm pretty sure the last night went down in history
But baby I'm alive and that's a victory
Black eyes, minor injuries
We lost a fight together that's a win to me
I don't drink cuz when I'm drunk I'm retarded
Ask around, I'm alive all the morning
Hold my beer, cuz I'm only getting started
Guess 'bout tomorrow I'm the miseryCall my phone, can't be quiet, can you hear it?
I don't hear it
Damn, oh no, all my sexy photos can't be cleared
We need to clear itI'm pretty sure the last night went down in history
But baby I'm alive and that's a victory
Black eyes, minor injuries
We lost a fight together that's a win to meI don't drink cuz when I'm drunk I'm retarded
Ask around, I'm alive all the morning
Hold my beer, cuz I'm only getting started
Guess 'bout tomorrow I'm the misery
